Media release

Fathers need support too

5 September 2008

There is growing understanding of the important influence fathers have on their children but the Families Commission says there is a distinct lack of services, support and information specifically designed for dads.

The Commission, Barnardos and Parents Centre recently joined in a project to talk to fathers from different walks of life about how they felt about their role and responsibilities.

The Commission is using the results of this, and its other consultation with fathers to help inform its research and advocacy on fathering.

“We’re looking at the obstacles to fathering and what information and services fathers want and need.  We want fathers to be as fully and confidently engaged with their families as possible,” said newly appointed Commissioner, Kim Workman.

“So far, in our various discussions with dads it’s become clear that men who have attended some sort of parenting programme have found it useful but they also felt it was largely aimed at mothers and this was particularly true of ante natal classes.”

Organisations, such as Plunket and Barnardos are introducing more father-friendly services and these are likely to expand as time goes on.

In general, the Commission has found that fathers tend to turn first to their partners, family and friends for support and seldom seek outside help.  Many say they would feel uncomfortable discussing their personal experiences or issues with strangers. 

“Support for men is a difficult issue because so many men don’t want to acknowledge they have a problem, let alone talk about it or join a group.  As members of the wider community, we need to make sure fathers feel able to reach out for the information and support they need and that this assistance is appropriate to their needs.”

Mr Workman said it was also important that the differences between mothering and fathering were understood and celebrated.

“Fathers Day is a great time to acknowledge this.  I encourage all my fellow fathers, grandads, and great-grandads to get out there, let the kids take a few risks, be adventurous and have fun together.”